New Eyes: The Gift of Being a Walking the Walk Group Leader | by Marilyn Berberich

I love to collect quotes. Maybe it’s hereditary. My father kept a folded piece of paper with favorite quotes in his wallet. I stitched a quote quilt and hung it by my desk.

One of my favorite quotes is by Marcel Proust – “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.” When I stepped into the role of Walking the Walk Group Leader seven years ago, I envisioned wonderful afternoons of dialogue, meaningful service experiences, plentiful opportunities to learn about other faith traditions, and happy times building community with the amazing teens who had signed up for the program. What I didn’t realize was that I would also be getting new eyes. I would never see the world the same way after each Walking the Walk journey.

So what does it mean to have new eyes? For me, it meant some consequential exchanges. I traded assumptions for surprises. There was no “one way” for just about anything. Each faith community was unique, each student was unique, and each session was unique. I quickly realized it was wiser to be flexible and intrigued by differences than to wed myself to preconceived ideas and plans. Without new eyes, learning experiences could vanish right in front of me.

I traded being locked into thoughtfully crafted agendas for lingering with times of connection and discovery. It’s no secret that I love being well-prepared. Crafting Walking the Walk sessions brought me great joy. However, seeing faces light up, watching students lean into conversations, and hearing laughter break out were moments that needed to be savored. My blueprint for the session was a starting place, but the afternoon came to life as the session unfolded in its own special way. Closing reflections convincingly underscored how personalized each student’s experience had been that day.

I traded aspirations for expertise for aspirations of humility. If you want to put pressure on yourself, try to become an expert. Every time I drifted in that direction, I felt waves of panic. There was no topic we would touch on at Walking the Walk that I could claim to have mastered. I knew I was on more solid ground when I modeled curiosity and challenged myself to generate and ask a compelling question. It was delightful to come to grips with the fact that I would be a perennial student. I would visit the same church, synagogue, mosque, gurdwara, or other place of worship for multiple years and always leave with some new learning or understanding. What a handsome reward!

I traded worries and a penchant for predictability for a willingness to be comfortable with discomfort. My first year as Walking the Walk Group Leader was marked by a steep learning curve. The folks at Interfaith Philadelphia, and Margie Scharf in particular, were my borrowed relationship capital. I was just a rookie doing my best to extend goodwill and establish my own personal connections. There were missteps and awkward situations. Occasionally there was feedback that rattled my confidence. Now and again, I was sure I wasn’t cut out for the job. And then came a moment of clarity… the path to understanding is rocky; it has blind curves; there’s no opportunity for speeding. And, yes, this is exactly what I signed up for! My heart woke up and my courage signed on for seven glorious years as a Walking the Walk Group Leader.

I have many beautiful photos and mementos from my Walking the Walk years. They make me smile, and they trigger marvelous memories. But most of all, they make me grateful for the wonderful mentors, religious leaders, and superstar students, and student group leaders who journeyed with me. They made my world shinier. They gave me new eyes.

Marilyn Berberich has been the Walking the Walk Group Leader since 2013 and finished her tenure with her eighth cohort this past May.